Takeoff

I’m sure I’ve said this before: my favorite place to write is 30,000 feet in the air. So here I am, looking out my window on my flight to Baltimore, Maryland on my way back to Missouri. Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros sing my flight safely to the runway. I am accompanied by my tall Starbuck’s Christmas blend, and the happiness that is a good trip home.

I’m not attempting to be morbid, but I’ll be honest. If I could die anywhere, it would be right here, up in the air; on an airplane, embarking on a new adventure or returning from some exploration. My mind would be full of stories, my feet dirty with the memories of a new place traveled to, or an old one revisited. And it’s here, right up here, that I feel most at home: on my way somewhere. It’s my muse, my element, my passion.

Takeoff is a surge, sure of momentum, but for me, it’s my healing. Airports breed a whole host of emotions: aching at the departure of a loved one, anxiety at the prospect of being so far off the ground, ecstasy at the return of a missing piece, anticipation at the road ahead, fear of the unknown, and comfort in business routines. Despite anything I’ve been feeling prior to boarding the plane, it dissipates the moment the plane accelerates. It’s the deepest comfort, soothing my ever spinning soul, opening the flood gates for wanderlust to take over my mind, and to be safe knowing my longing will be fulfilled. Back to morbidity then: such contentment… this is where I would want to have my last breath. Here, this channel for such great journeys on earth, to be the gateway to the greatest adventure I’ve never tasted, death. New life. Completion, touching my Savior.

So, if ever my life ends en route to a new adventure, whether it be crossing a great ocean on the deck of a ferry, flying across the great mass of continents, or blazing through the miles of some beautiful country in a long black train, don’t cry for me. It will have been a reflection of every other moment in my life, always moving, a transient soul longing to taste all the energy of exploration. My bittersweet drug, always dragging me from one place I love, into the hurricane of lust for the next place.